Alien^3 - 4/10 - you little bitch, killing off Hicks and Newt offscreen. Looked nice though.
Alien Resurrection - 2/10 - Wait, how do we get Ripley back?
Alien vs. Predator - 1/10 - Just dog crap.
Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem - 1/10, same.
Prometheus - 5/10. Needed a bit explaining that the only scientists willing to go on a 4+ year mission completely blind were the STUPID ones.
Alien: Covenant - 2/10 - I don’t remember, did I actually WATCH this? I seem to remember being disappointed that they didn’t follow up on the promise of Prometheus by finding the Engineers.
But I’m sure this new installment on an old IP will be another 10/10. We’re gonna break the cycle and then every new remake and continuation will be good until the rest of time and all of our childhood memories will be restored and no longer pissed on and then they’ll remake Spider-Man for a seventh time and it’ll be the greatest movie ever and then we can finally increase the production of new takes on old IPs and we will have endless, engaging movies and well all start spending the $18 for a ticket to watch a movie in the theaters again and climate change will reverse itself and we can increase our carbon output because it turned out that we weren’t released “too much” co2 into the atmosphere, we weren’t releasing enough!
Running through my mental checklist:
Alien - 10/10
Aliens - 11/10 - dialled it up a notch.
Alien^3 - 4/10 - you little bitch, killing off Hicks and Newt offscreen. Looked nice though.
Alien Resurrection - 2/10 - Wait, how do we get Ripley back?
Alien vs. Predator - 1/10 - Just dog crap.
Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem - 1/10, same.
Prometheus - 5/10. Needed a bit explaining that the only scientists willing to go on a 4+ year mission completely blind were the STUPID ones.
Alien: Covenant - 2/10 - I don’t remember, did I actually WATCH this? I seem to remember being disappointed that they didn’t follow up on the promise of Prometheus by finding the Engineers.
But I’m sure this new installment on an old IP will be another 10/10. We’re gonna break the cycle and then every new remake and continuation will be good until the rest of time and all of our childhood memories will be restored and no longer pissed on and then they’ll remake Spider-Man for a seventh time and it’ll be the greatest movie ever and then we can finally increase the production of new takes on old IPs and we will have endless, engaging movies and well all start spending the $18 for a ticket to watch a movie in the theaters again and climate change will reverse itself and we can increase our carbon output because it turned out that we weren’t released “too much” co2 into the atmosphere, we weren’t releasing enough!