trying to stop being so thin skinned:
I had an online discussion with a random, we had a short but intense exchange until he replied and then blocked me, robbing me of a chance to reply.
I feel hurt because I couldn’t reply. To me that means he won. I feel insulted and angry.
Yes, this is something I should talk to about with a shrink, but the therapist I contacted hasn’t replied yet, so I might have to start looking for a new one if this one ain’t reliable.
In the meantime I turn to the second best thing I can think of: this channel.
I can try to rationalize it: I cannot change it, I’m letting that guy live free in my mind, letting it go is the rational thing to do.
Except that here I’m not being rational, but emotional and I don’t know why this triggers me so much.
Not getting the last word triggers me. How would you solve this?
You could find solace in hard determinism.
This was always going to be the way it happened.
Your actions were determined by your biology and life experience up to that point. Likewise, the other person acted how they did according to their biology and experience.
The gears of the universe turned in the only way they were going to turn, and the outcome you got was the only one that was ever going to happen.
It doesn’t mean that you can’t now act upon it moving forward, but hopefully there’s some calm to be had in knowing that what has already happened was always going to happen. It’s just a tiny artifact of the vast and intricate clockwork of the universe.