That grandpa gives off Bangkok sexpat vibes
Where’s the line, like initial attraction is kind of - by definition always limited in it’s understanding of “the other”… Whether that’s a woman finding a fatherly figure attractive, or a gay guy finding a bear attractive, or someone finding an Irish accent hot…
They’re all empty slates we project onto, it’s only later that we learn about the human beyond those characteristics. Then we find out they’re kind of a horrible person, and that’s the end of that.
as a gay guy, it definitely starts off with “the other person is a human with needs” [commonly with the subtext “and i hope one of those needs is to fuck me”]
Asian women generally face a lot more sexual harassment in western countries than white women because of the idea people have that they’re submissive and ‘traditional’ and won’t defend themselves. If you can’t imagine being fetishised is a bad thing you have serious issues with empathising.
Dating someone who fetishises you means they don’t care about your personality or other traits except for the trait they fetishise. They’ll try to fit you into a racial mould you probably don’t belong to just to satisfy their weird fantasies. They do not care that they hurt you in the process because you’re not a person to them.
Most people like attributes of other people.
Most people don’t like being liked because of attributes.
When someone is obsessed with Asian culture and they seek out someone that is Asian, It takes a special kind of person to accept that process it and work with it. Some people can use it to their advantage. Most wouldn’t want to.
Remember, if anyone is ever attracted to you, they must be fetishising you!
I’d say it’s obvious that that’s not what the comic is saying but it’s probably hard to tell the difference if no one has ever been attracted to you.
That would be a pretty trashy thing to say, indeed; is this from personal experience?
Sick burn brother
I forgive you for starting it. Please don’t fetishise me, I am a human bean!
Don’t quit your day job for standup
How can you talk to your brother in such a way? What would Mom think?
almost salvaged it with this one
The more your relationships are about appearance, the less you can know about yourself and them since you are certain to not chase a partner to be a trophy among other effects
It’s not about being a “trophy”. I just want to be with someone that I’m physically attracted to, and who is physically attracted to me. I don’t think that’s unreasonable. Obviously we need to have compatible personalities/interests beyond that but it is a big factor.
You choose how big. Once you are mature or old, you realise how little it means
I’ve never been able to force myself to be romantically interested in some one I wasn’t attracted to. I’ve tried. I’m pretty sure I’ve been on the opposite side of that as well and it made for a shitty relationship.
Yeah it isn’t fair if you do it and don’t want to. Therefore, you may chose. You are arguing that nobody should be allowed to choose.
You are arguing that nobody should be allowed to choose.
I never said a thing about what other people are allowed to do. My point was if there’s no physical attraction the relationship isn’t going to work because the physical intimacy isn’t going to last. Unless you just don’t care about physical intimacy I guess. Also I said I tried dating someone I wasn’t attracted to. What is that if not “choosing”? I can’t turn myself off an on at will. My initial response was to you saying that by looking for someone you find attractive you are looking for a trophy. Implying that the only reason to do so is to have someone to show off. That’s insulting. I don’t give a shit about what other people think about anyone I’m in a relationship with. Our attraction to each other and compatibility is what I care about.
You don’t choose that. It’s different for everybody.
That’s like saying people choose whether or not to be gay or bi versus being straight.
If you aren’t attractive or attracted to someone the couple will not be happy. That’s what you’re deciding for others. Condemning some to be alone forever.
If you don’t want to, you don’t need to focus on that. You can also adjust how much. Personally I get energy from being attracted and attractive, but I don’t control what others choose.
I don’t even know what point you’re trying to make. Not everybody is going to be attractive to every other person.
My gf and I are both attracted to each other, but there’s many people (millions, even) who would find neither of us attractive. Those people aren’t obligated to potentially date us just because it might make us sad that they’re not attracted to us.
In these days it’s often hard for Americans to understand. Forcing, or saying others cannot or should not do x, is completely unnecessary when it’s something they do in private. I know you have trouble with the arguments and that’s because there is no existing valid argument for why you should not choose yourself how much appearance means to you. you. Not others. What is your preference may not be others, and it’s possible (believe it or not) to allow others to be off doing their preference. You don’t have to kill kids or anything in schools before you act, you can already right now choose, but only for you! Mind you! Only for you, and not for another. You may not choose how much another wants that or force others to want to have your marriage, or exit theirs. It can be confusing but it is possible to do this without slaughtering children and deporting workers that don’t have your skincolor. You can do it
The author of this comic is missing the fact that everything and everyone is fetishized. Rule34, anyone? Everyone has a think they’re really into. If you live Asians then you shouldn’t be scolded for it, nor feel bad. I like latinas, my wife is Latina, and fuck yeah are we each others fetish and happy about it!
I feel this author is one of those “I’m angry at everything and everyone, and it’s everyone’s fault except mine” types.
Everyone is free to have their kinks. They are not free to objectify people over them.
