Oof. My mother has borderline personality disorder (BPD), and I have definitely felt similar to this throughout my life.
Have you checked out r/raisedbynarcissists or r/raisedbyborderlines?
Fyi, if you haven’t learned it yet, you will learn soon in your life that attempting to help/fix her is an absolutely pointless endeavor. Point blank, full stop. It only hurts you. Cluster B personality disorders (which your mom shows sooo many signs of) are notoriously terrible at being helped, even by trained therapists. You must keep her at arms length, and focus on healing yourself.
Yeah, you have to be braindead trust a game developer with any kernel level software.
I think a more secure solution would be some kind of virtualized environment to run the game within, which the developer could have full control over, but I doubt that will ever come about.