I have one cat with both my favorite behavior and least favorite behavior.

She’ll sleep on my chest at night 🥰, but refuses to be picked up 😞.

Can’t argue with that. 🤷🏻‍♂️

Instead of adding noise to more people’s feeds, why not try having meaningful conversations with people you know personally?

Yeah. Heard so much about Elden Ring, and watched the kids play it, so I thought I’d give it a shot.

After about 45 minutes of wandering aimlessly and nearly as many deaths, I decided I wasn’t having a good time.

I have no idea what I’m for, but it is downloading now.

I already keep bread in the freezer.

Wouldn’t you rather enjoy it?

Anything good? I’m sick of my addictive mobile games.

A common mistranslation.

When Abraham asked what happens on the other side, God said “…uhh, nothing?” Which implies that it’s a bitchin’ party that Abe wasn’t invited to.

My face is so ugly, my hairline is slowly trying to get away from it.

Two for one deal.

I’m pretty sure a spider’s only goal is eating insects.

Take care of your teeth.

Set unbreakable rules for yourself BEFORE you are in a high pressure or mind altering situation. (Don’t trust the drunk or stressed out version of you to make good choices. If you decide that you won’t be driving BEFORE you take the first drink, drunk you won’t have to make that decision later.)

Most people are too busy worrying about that super embarrassing thing THEY did to think about the super embarrassing thing YOU did.

People who are different from you do not add or remove value from who you are.

🤓 aktually, they are arachnids.

If my joints feel a little stiff, or if I bend a certain way and it’s not real comfortable, then I focus on that and give it an extended focused stretch.

Also, it’s a good idea to stretch before any physical activity.

This is what happens when the stupid try to manage the smart.

Wait… Are you telling me they WEREN’T born with those balls under the tailgate?

We also tried it, and I was impressed. There are enough little synchronicities that make you think it might be intentional, but if I recall, after the first half hour or so, there aren’t nearly as many.

My guess is if they made one without the gaskets, it would leak.

With the wizard of Oz playing?

I pronounced the last part Atsha.

Shit. Anyone with that blood is worth some money! I’ll just be yet another kid that can’t stand him.