For anyone who feels this way after waking up from what should have been “enough” sleep, consider getting a home sleep test. Going from moderate sleep apnea to none was life-changing. If this is how you feel regularly, it doesn’t necessarily have to be this way.
I’d encourage you to think about these events as you would a physical injury. A physical injury can hurt for a long time and no amount of recognition or “processing” or “getting over it” can short-cut the all-too-slow healing that needs to take place. It’s no fun and there’s no way to just make it go away.
That said, you can do things that care for the injury while it is healing. I don’t know what these are for you, but for me, I needed to recognize that the people I was angry at were also instrumental in helping me advance.
For example, I had a string of terrible jobs with bad bosses, but that string of terrible jobs led me to someplace that I am very happy to work. Once I realized this, it started getting easier to recognize both that the way I was treated was wrong and that I was also glad that these people were essential to me get to where I am. Even so, it was a long process and physically painful. My anger towards these people did nothing to hurt them, but it was terrible on my health.
I’m sorry you had to experience these things, but I hope they eventually lead you to someplace better.
As a preliminary test, you might look at a “sleep apnea adjustable mouthpiece” for sale online. I don’t know how well these work, but my custom sleep apnea dental device has been amazing for me. It may be that the boil-and-bite varieties also work well. If so, you might get relief without having to interact with the healthcare system.
You might find more information here.
As for the sleep test, many factors are important, but you could learn a lot from monitoring your pulse oxygen while you sleep. A casual search turned up several very affordable fingertip pulse oximeters that connect via Bluetooth. This would let you create a record of your pulse oxygen levels while you sleep. If you are dropping below 92% while you sleep (link), then you might be sleeping poorly because of sleep apnea.
In fact, you could record your SPO2 levels with and without the sleep apnea device to rule its use in or out without spending a ton of money on doctors visits and the like.
I hope things get better for you.