Post baby Bible photos on bookface and pretend your life is better than it is. Fight with your Bible spouse in public but in hushed tones. File for Bible divorce but learn you can neither marry, nor divorce a book so you were never really married to begin with. It was just a weird ceremony you held alone in your basement surrounded by stuffed animals. 🧸

Take the eldest bible to soccer practice, eye up other bible’s mums. Secretly hook up with another bible’s mum and……