Whatever happened to the buddy system?
The buddy system is flawed and fascist. If your buddy walks off a cliff do you go with them? By the rules of the buddy system you do. If your buddy commits genocide do you go along with it? The buddy system says yes. And what about a double homicide? If both buddies die in the woods and no other buddies are there to witness it was there a crime?
Wait, you’re saying I didn’t have to commit that genocide?
Yeah, but it was a lot of fun, remember when we made them reenact the entirety of the Abyss in Klingon?
Sorry, all I remember is the rivers of blood. And do you know how much blood it takes to fill a river? I was squeezing it out of corpses for days.
Why didn’t you use the blood drainer 5000? We had like 10 of them!
Kids these days! Back in my day we stacked the corpses high enough to have gravity squeeze the juices out!
What do you think I am, made of genocide money?
Wait you’re not made of genocide money?
Ohhh, shit, hmmm, I got a few things I gotta send back then.
NO! If you or someone you know suffered irreparable harm thanks to the so called “buddy system” call AdamEatsAss today. A class action lawsuit is being filed against the deep buddy state cabal and we need more victims to step forward. If your buddy forced you to smuggle illegal goods inside your body, call us. If your buddy forced you to overthrow a democratically elected government in the developing world, call us. If your buddy forced you to act on a plan to steal the mook using a shrink ray, call us. We will not stop fighting until the buddy system is no more.
This sure goes deep! Thank you for spreading the word.
That’s not all Adam spreads
An example for us all
My internet sleuth skills are a little rusty, but I’m pretty sure this headline is implying that the tourist killed a doctor, and is now missing.
Shitrag news source is indeed implying this. It’s a totally different island. The state of news today.
AFAIK there is a bad heat wave going on in Greece at the moment. Hikers “vanishing” due to being underprepared is no miracle at all.
Must’ve found the Gorgons.