Trained pavlovian responses to sensory triggers. If you meditate to the smell of lavender enough times eventually it starts inducing a trance you can use to combat panic attacks. You can also use other smells, sounds, colored lights, textures, etc. It actually works best if you use multiple different senses at a time. The catch is you have to continue meditating to whatever sensory trigger(s) you’ve decided on, and you have to do it more often than you use it to stop anxiety/panic. If you use it a bunch of times when you’re anxious / panicking and don’t keep using those triggers when you’re already calm, eventually the behavioral pathway will flip and the calming trigger will start causing anxiety instead because that’s when you’re doing it most. Ever set your morning alarm to your favorite song (if you haven’t, don’t). Even your favorite song in the world will eventually sour if it’s heard more often interrupting a blissful sleep than being vibed to.

I’ve used it for art and writing before but I find while it does make a product that’s like 75% done you still have to do a lot of editing and if you don’t fundamentally understand what you’re trying to do you won’t be able to edit it correctly. AI is for making you faster at what you already do, not for shoring up the fact that you never learned something to begin with.

Sir, we’re gonna need a sample, for science.

Healthcare CEOs and Insurance companies are in an ever-escalating competition to squeeze as much money and labor as possible out of their workers and patients. My recent comment history actually has several related rants.

I had literally never even heard of this I was taught the previous, thank you for sharing :)

Similar to how you can feel a sensual touch on your lips, nipples, or fingertips. There’s a bunch of nerves there and if you’re having a good time already and you’re relaxed enough for it to not hurt, all that stimulation feels good. It also has the benefit of being right behind the vagina and the trailing tail ends of the internal clitoris, so they get stimulated a little too.

Additionally, if we’re talking multiple penetration, when you have an object in the anus whether it’s static or thrusting it stretches out the rectum and occupies space within the the pelvis. This means that when you go to insert an object into the vagina, there is less space in the pelvis for it to also expand out into. This means that the vagina will be tighter around the inserted object and as a result that object will feel larger than it otherwise would.

Even without any of that they say the brain is your biggest sex organ for a reason, some people can actually meditate themselves to orgasm (although there is some abdominal flexing iirc). Anal is a taboo at least to some extent in most places, and psychologically that’s a cheap arousal button for an insane number of people.

Oh wait you mean forward up between the lips? Yeah but not like into the vagina, it gets up into the hair like you said and disperses from there. Also for some reason I wanna say those ones don’t really smell much even. It’s those hot little ones that do that but I think that happens to guys too, idk tho you tell me.

This would explain the institutional connection, cots can be narrow.

1. Don’t, for the most part. If it’s any more effort than literally just turning a and saying a single sentence like if you’d have to take more than a step or two or she’s reading/listening to something and you’d have to do something to break her attention, don’t bother. There’s good odds that’s intentional on her part but at the very least it’s annoying. There’s a little bit of flex to these depending on culture, so it’s always worth asking a woman from your own culture.

2. Don’t compliment the natural state of her body, for a variety of reasons. A haircut or other cosmetic choice is usually fine. Tattoos are fine but bring up another point, avoid complimenting things in the bathing suit zone. It sounds obscure/complicated but consider the example of a tattoo poking out of a shirt collar. We all know it’s on her tit; leave it alone.

3. Do compliment something she chose, especially if it looks like something they put a lot of effort into choosing like a coordinated outfit, or a well-made cosplay. It can also help to avoid complimenting the shirt and/or skirt (possibly misconstrued to tits and ass) and choose an accessory like a bag, bracelet, or scarf instead. Careful about shoes, feet have become a sort of Western cultural shorthand for “weirdo” (despite the relative banality of that kink once you know what other shit goes on in that scene).

4. Do compliment something specific about the thing that briefly highlights either something you might have in common, or some kind of knowledge/skill you have (example: “I loved [TV show] but was always more of a [different character] fan” or “the leatherwork on your bag is excellent, you have good taste!” (but you better know your leather!). Don’t make it a question (see below)

5. Say that like, one sentence, then immediately move away slightly and focus your attention on something else entirely. It gives her breathing room and lets her decide what happens next. Most of the time you’ll still probably still get a fake smile/nod, but this is probably the lowest pressure way to approach a strange woman. You’re better off just getting to know people through volunteering or a hobby group (if you really wanna meet women, join a yoga or dance class, or a knitting or romance novel club).

Your body is making sure it can still do that. Like literally checking that it can and also doing basic maintenance / resource delivery to make sure it will continue to be able to.

This was the thing I learned today

First question: have you considered finding a woman in the same predicament? You’d have a lot in common and she’d understand where you’re coming from. I wouldn’t go to a support group with the intention of finding a date specifically, but honestly getting out and connecting with other people, or even just connecting online, could go a long way towards alleviating some of your loneliness.

Another facet I think is super important to mention here, a lot of people meet other people by being introduced by someone else. This is a big part of why it’s so important to develop and do hobbies and pastimes and attend culturally unifying gatherings like religious ceremonies and festivals. While moving away from religion has had some benefits, we haven’t really paid much attention to replacing it’s social benefits, such as giving people a place to go on a regular schedule, which is one of the key factors in forming long-term bonds.

If you’re asking if I would personally date you, I have no idea, I’ve never met you, you’re probably not my partner’s type, and I really don’t go solo anymore these days. I will tell you what I told my partner about the “in sickness and in health” bit: I’m not going to be a primary day-to-day caregiver, there would need to be a home health aid 98% of the time and I would just pitch in if they weren’t available or needed a hand. I also refuse to deal with any man who does not take an effective leading role in their own care. I’ve gotten sucked into too many fixer-upper men (only with mental illness thus far) and I’m not putting myself anywhere near that position ever again. I can’t believe I got to the point in my life that I’ve had to add “calls own psychiatrist independently” to my list of criteria but here we are.

Why do you sleep with your hand down the front of your pants? I’ve worked in multiple psych hospitals, for a while exclusively with men and a bunch sleep with their hand on their junk. I thought it was purely an institutional “thing” that they’d picked up to protect the family jewels but then I noticed other men I knew casually doing it, even just while relaxing while awake and one of our security even got fired for falling asleep out on the unit in a patient care area like that, so it must be comfy, but is that the only reason?

They better get to it. Edit: the way to destroy the universe, I mean.

I like thegirlwiththedogs ’ wisdom,“As always, we disarm our opponent before battle.”

There are a lot of times patients say doing something hurts and I’m like “Holy shit, please stop doing that, why were you doing that in the first place?”

Most often its when a patient is in full blown bouncing off the walls mania, hasn’t slept in over a week, barely even sits down, and they tell me their feet hurt. SIR PLEASE GET OFF THEM for 5 whole seconds at least they look like fucking balloons!

And then they start demanding pain relief beyond Tylenol and Motrin and it’s like MF you can barely walk in a straight line or open your eyes if I give you opiates you will literally crack your face open on the linoleum you could not pay me enough to risk my license like that and tbh I want you to be able to feel your feet begging for a break because you really need to give them one before they literally start cracking open and leaking serous interstitial fluid all over the floor because I have actually literally seen that happen before.

TLDR: My manic patients often tell me walking hurts and I tell them to stop doing that. A lot.

That’s phase 2: people work better in groups.

I had to suppress the knee-jerk urge to insult someone

I appreciate you behaving; I’ve been trying to be a little better behaved online myself lately.

…all of the above? They’re pretty standardized cosmetology concepts. I feel like you’re trying to make a “gotcha” a la modern cancel culture’s narrow understanding of beauty standards beyond pure capitalist sales tactics or even just a general philosophical overcomplication of a concept that’s actually pretty simple and widely applicable.

There’s a lot of basic cosmetic / aesthetic concepts that are relatively stable even across time and cultures, but that are still widely applicable enough that you can account for narrower or subcultural variations.

So for instance face shapes, like I said. Oval faces are gonna look good with the widest range of hair styles, but generally speaking large flat bangs or long unlayered hair are going to sit strangely on the proportions. As far as hairstyles go that barely even counts as specific, but it does help point you in an artistic direction that’s most likely to generate a pleasing result to most people.

Now that last bit is where you seem like you want to quibble about (people on the internet LOVE to nitpick casually made absolute statements; its an extremely easy to learn logical concept that you can use to derail a wide variety of otherwise useful conversations) so I’d like to refocus this conversation on my original point:

If you would like to be more broadly attractive to a wider range of people, here’s the general style guide from people who have a good eye for that kind of thing. If you’d rather just be an odd-shaped pot and sit around and wait for your lid, that’s completely fine too. Often those are some of the best relationships. The issue is a lot of people lack the introspective clarity to accept that weird shaped lids often take a while to find. A lot of these people become rather upset that there’s “no answer” to why it’s taking them so long to find someone when there absolutely is an answer, just not one that requires 0 effort from them.

I’m rather partial to a nice square goatee these days but that’s probably just because that’s what looks best on my current partner (I like him a lot). Beards are very similar to haircuts in that they are best groomed with consideration for the person’s other visual characteristics such as face shape, overall style sense, and the amount of contrast and undertones of their hair and skin.

So many men would be 500% more attractive if they literally just took a day to sit down and do some basic research into what styles of head and facial hair look best on them, as well as what clothes and colors suit their current body type and how to pick glasses shapes and stuff. It feels like most men are like 5 infographics and a little advice from a friend with decent fashion sense away from being hot as all hell.

Edit: did a little googling and my vagina / feminine libido would like to sign off on Bespoke Unit Even if you’re not much for suits, they’ve got a lot of good info on how to pick the right hair, beard, glasses, etc, and they talk about how to dress a variety of body types respectfully but also without hedging.

I’m getting pretty sick of people blaming the jobs themselves. I firmly believe that’s another one of capitalism’s psyops to convince us we’re lazy and selfish for not wanting to put up with its bullshit anymore.

I actually love my job itself, even the butt-wiping. Tbh the butt wiping has actually been one of the better parts of my job, because I get to help someone who is uncomfortable and unable to do anything about it get comfortable again. From what I can tell most people are actually like that if you make sure they have what they need. I find most people will try to help others as long as they’re taken care of enough themselves, capitalism just refuses to allow that. If we help each other, we don’t have to pay to be helped.

It’s the capitalist influence that’s consistently rotting the heart and soul out of everything, not the actual work of connecting with and caring for other humans. I think the propaganda has gotten good at making us forget that.