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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 9th, 2023

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  • Was about to say this myself before I saw your comment. I’m 6ft 1 in (185 cm) and I stand up as soon as we land because after 2 hours of having my knees jammed up against the seat in front, I want relief. I can only imagine how much worse it is for taller people. For shorter people who do this I will also give the benefit of the doubt because most seats on planes are not the most comfortable.


  • Agree that if an incident happens in a particular jurisdiction, the local court should handle it. That makes sense, no argument here. But here they get to choose the set of laws because there was no physical location? That just feels wrong somehow. Anyway there is a physical location and if anything, the incident was ‘perpetrated’ by a person who was physically located somewhere at the time. It should be handled by the court local to them at the time. In the case of organisations, I guess this would mean where the defendant company operates from. Or if we accept it is virtual and everywhere then, it should be governed by federal laws not state laws.




  • I’d call ‘actual adulting’ having responsibility for another’s welfare. Whether a dog, cat or human, they are all varying levels of “if I fuck up, someone else suffers”.

    I still don’t feel fully like an adult, but I do feel the responsibility of ensuring there is food on the table and a roof over our heads. My partner is also responsible for these things so it is a little less pressure.

    All said I do not feel as adult as I saw my parents when they were my age. They seemed very grown up and very responsible compared to how I feel today. I was 11 when my dad was my age.



  • I did online dating for many years. I used match, eharmony, tinder, pof, okcupid.

    I fully understand the ‘soul destroying’ comment. For me it was a lot of work for little return. I started off being selective. Messaging one person at a time so I didn’t end up getting two responses and having to put someone off or turn one of them down. That was naive it turned out as I got very few replies. So I started messaging multiple people at once. I always tried to personalise things but my effort varied with how optimistic I was feeling about online dating.

    Ultimately I think I got responses about 10% of the time. From them, 10% turned into a date, from those maybe 50% would get to a second date.

    So overall it every hundred messages I’d write , 1 would end up in a date. I went on quite a lot of dates over the years, but I had to devote so much time to getting them it was, soul destroying.

    I never thought i was unattractive, but online dating made me question if I really was. I never thought I was an ass, but online dating made me question if I really was. I would sometimes have very long conversations before meeting to find there was no chemistry in person. Sometimes I would like them when we meet and they would ghost me. Sometimes they liked me and I didn’t like them, but I always tried to be honourable and tell them, not ghost them since I didn’t like it happening to me.

    I am male in case my experience doesn’t make it obvious. I often spoke to some of the women I got on better with about how online dating was for them and their experience was pretty awful for different reasons. Generally they were bombarded by messages and a good number of them were obscene. Guys trying to hook up rather than date. To manage their inbox was a real challenge and they probably missed out on good matches because of the noise.

    My overall impression of the whole thing is that it generally sucks regardless of whether you are the one doing most of the messaging or whether you are receiving messages. I also think it makes it more like shopping than dating, dehumanising people. Do I want the 8K 42 inch TV or the 4K inch TV? Actually, can I even afford it?

    All that said in the end it worked for me. Over 6 years since I last logged in and I think it was a bit of an addiction, or perhaps desperation born of loneliness.i also have a daughter now and there were times I thought that was never going to happen.

    So for me online dating was years of frustration, difficulty and upset, but in the end I’m glad I did it but it took a long time.