4 years ago next week marks my mom’s diagnosis and the 10 months that followed. Watching your loved ones go slowly insane and become unable to speak and move in such a short time (she was mid 50s) when they should be healthy changes you. Everything I look at, everything I think about is now looked at under a different lense. And given my age, there just aren’t a lot of people around me who have any idea what it’s like and assume it’s just handling the pain.
I had to watch my dad’s being and body melt over 12 months dying of Glioblastoma.
And people just don’t get that.
4 years ago next week marks my mom’s diagnosis and the 10 months that followed. Watching your loved ones go slowly insane and become unable to speak and move in such a short time (she was mid 50s) when they should be healthy changes you. Everything I look at, everything I think about is now looked at under a different lense. And given my age, there just aren’t a lot of people around me who have any idea what it’s like and assume it’s just handling the pain.
Like… no. I’m different now.
Sorry you had to go through that. I hope you’ve been able to use that experience to make the most of life.
Luckily I have a good therapist.
Who lost his sister to it.
Doesn’t help that my brother also died of a heroin overdose (just 5 months before diagnosis ).
My mom moved away after Dad died to live near her sister… Which I understand. But dam I feel abandoned.
Also sometime in between I got a fibromyalgia diagnosis. So in also grieving my old life/body. Bleh. Hugs 🫂
Damn you’ve had it hard. I hope you find some joy in life, you deserve it.
I often think that as my body wastes away it will be a lot harder for the people around me than it will be for me.
They will have to watch it happen knowing they can’t help, whereas once I’m gone I won’t have to deal with the sadness and aftermath.
Sorry you had to deal with that.