So, I’m a pretty average-height guy—5’7”. Not tall, not short, just… there. My feet, however, did not get the memo. They are gigantic. Size 15. Which means I leave footprints that suggest someone much larger (or possibly Bigfoot) passed through, got spooked, and took off running.
People always comment. First, the double-take. Then: “Whoa. Those are… big.” And finally, the classic: “How do you even find shoes?”
Badly. That’s how.
Shoe shopping for me is like searching for an ancient artifact. Store clerks disappear into the back, only to return shaking their heads, as if I’d asked for a unicorn saddle. “We might have one pair in the back…” And what they bring out is always tragic—some orthopedic dad sneaker the size of a small canoe, usually in a shade best described as “beige disappointment.”
For a while, I tried to hide it. I slouched. I crammed my toes into size 13s like a Victorian woman chasing a terrible beauty standard. I even considered custom shoes—until I saw the price and briefly thought maybe barefoot life isn’t so bad.
But now? I’ve embraced it. I don’t tip over easily. I get extra legroom on buses just by existing. And when people ask about my shoe size, I just smile and say, “Great for swimming.”
Bro, you should become a boxer. The amount of force you could generate with those feet would be insane.
Puddleglum the Marshwiggle shoe shopping
Did your uncle disappear one day and leave you a mysterious envelope?
Is your best friend a gardener?
Is another of your friends too tall to stand upright in your house, especially in his pointy hat?
I came here to say something similar.
For some reasons your feet look waaaay bigger than they are. My feet are the same size and I can agree. Buying shoes is a nightmare. Luckyly we got a store that sells all kinds of stuff and this is the only place I am able to find shoes that fit and that aren’t absolutely ugly.
I’m 5’7” too and my shoes size is 9.5 US, and I was ashamed of my feet. Now seeing yours, those were astounding. You sure won’t need fins when go diving.
Haha! I feel part of your pain. I also wear size fifteen. I got the height to go with them, though. Still, I live in Korea, and well, they do not have big feet around here.
How much better at swimming are you than your peers?
You should start an onlyfans for your feet. Then you could buy custom shoes with the money.
You’ll grow into it
So EU size 47.
Geländevernichtungsbretter (ground flattening boards) or Kindersärge (childrens coffins), as we call those kinds of shoes. I had a friend with EU size 48, but at least he had the matching height.
That’s way smaller than they look. I would have guessed a 52+. A size 47 is not unusual.
Can’t be a 47. I use a 46 and IIRC it’s a us 12 or something like that. It must be EU 50 or something.
Also a good one is, that you can go to the firefighters to walk out forrestfires.
My Vans are a 49 EU?
Yea eu47 is 13, not 15
Shoe sizes are all over the place, you know that anyways. I’m somewhere between 12.5 and 14(.5) when looking for fitting shoes in the us
Check out barefoot shoes, maybe they help getting a shorter shoe. My size mostly comes from a need of a wider toe box. YMMV
You could see your feet coming around the corner then about 10 minutes later you show up.
This man cannot be knocked over.
You sir, are a comedy genius. I couldn’t stop laughing.
Bro could hang 10 off an awning
Get the ring to Mordor Mr. Frodo.
