I don’t want pity. Just someone to hear me.
Debt collectors are threatening my family.
I’m trying everything — writing, working, asking.
Nothing works.
I’m holding on by a thread.
I write horror stories, but real life is worse.
Ko-fi is in my bio, but even a kind word helps.
In Australia we have a thing called a part 9 debt agreement. If you enter into one of those it’s an ‘act of bankruptcy’ but you have an agreement with creditors to pay them off over a long period and potentially without interest.
Once in an agreement I believe they must stop hassling you.
Source: had one 20+ years ago.
I could have gone bankrupt instead, but it wasn’t fair to the people who I owed money to.
Wow, well done mate.
Thanks :)
Had a tricky patch in life. Recovered. I remember the calls and letters from that time, and the relief of finding a way out. Not sure if it can help OP, but hope there’s something similar available today.
Debt collectors are not the mob (sort of), they’re not after you because you hurt their feelings.
Ask them straight up what the minimum amount you can pay to keep them off your back is, and move rivers and mountains to make those small payments. Pay more whenever you get the opportunity to. They just want you to pay SOMETHING.
Instead of your debts wearing you down, wear down your debts. Little by little. A drop of water can cut a boulder in half just by being persistent.
I get what you’re saying, and maybe in some places that works. But here in Ukraine, some debt collectors act like the mob — threats, harassment, even to people I don’t know. Still, thank you for the advice. I’ll try to chip away at it, piece by piece.
Are they actually the mob, or are they just putting up a front?
In Japan the NHK, the country’s public broadcast service, resorts to mob tactics to get people to pay their “required donations.”
Every time they talk to me I just act like a wall. They can’t actually do anything to me, no matter what they say.
I don’t know if they’re technically mob, but the way they pressure and threaten definitely feels criminal.
It’s not just scary — it’s paralyzing. Especially when you’re alone in another country and trying to stay strong for your kid.
Thanks for sharing your take — weirdly comforting to know I’m not the only one getting this kind of intimidation.
NGL, this is a bit suspicious to me. ‘You tried everything’ but apparently you didn’t try just standing up to them?
“When you’re alone in another country” implies OP is an expat, but then they don’t go to their consulate? Riiiiiight. OP is a scammer.
I’ve had them after me before. I still don’t answer my phone if I don’t recognize the number. I feel you. And sometimes even when you pay, someone else calls to try collecting the same debt! They lie and say the sheriff is on the way with a warrant. It’s hugely stressful.
Listen, their job is to collect and they get money into their own pocket if they do. I got a call a couple of months ago from the pre-legal specialist or whatever. Mate, everything that happens before you get a court summons is pre-legal going all the way back to the original sale—it’s just a bullshit term to make you believe you’ll be sued if you don’t work with them now.
I have some suggestions for anyone in the US. Caveat: I live in a purple state. Red states might be less borrower-friendly, but you still have things you can do.
First, within 30 days of a new collector contacting you (and if one company fails they are more likely to sell your debt than sue you), send them (certified mail so you have proof of delivery) a proof of validation letter and demand the amount of the debt, original creditor, say that you are disputing the debt (you don’t have to go into details), and a demand for verification, proof of assignment, and last payment date.
They are required to cease harassing you until they have fulfilled that request—if they don’t you can sue them. I’ve heard of at least one person who primarily earns money by getting harassed by collectors and suing them. but It will also tell them you know your rights and they might be less aggressive with you. This is federal law. You have this right in the reddest state.
Second, if you can’t pay a debt, don’t unless there is a court order. Pay attention to that last payment date. In my state, after 7 years without a payment or court action, that debt is uncollectable. Not every state is so borrower-friendly, so look up the laws. If you are close to the statute of limitations, just let that shit fly. Now, they can sell that debt and give some other collector another seven years, but they have to find someone to buy a debt no one has paid on in 7 years, and that a pretty bad investment.
Third, if you can pay a debt, call them up and cut a deal. You can often get up to 50% off the total if you can pay today. Now they are going to negotiate hard and you might not be able to get them down that low. Tell them you got a bonus at work and they can take half or you’re calling your next creditor and seeing if they want your money.
Fourth, and I’ll be honest this one is a little shady but harmless, once you pay a debt off, dispute it with the each credit agency. Even if it was a legitimate debt, I’ve found 9 times out of 10 once that debt collector has your money, they don’t bother responding with proof of debt and it falls off your credit report.
Try to avoid a court judgement and garnishment. That can have long term repercussions. If things are that bad and you are drowning in debt, it may be time to call a bankruptcy specialist. I’ve never been in that position and I’ve had probably $20-30k in debt fall off due to statute of limitations.
I know it feels like an incredible weight. The system is designed that way. But it all feels way worse than it actually is. You have tools. You are not powerless. Good luck, mate.
Haha, there’s one specific ringtone that still gives a small pang of panic when I hear it, and it’s been almost a decade since Ive been out of collections. I largely used the dispute option off of creditkarma, though that might have been before intuit bought them, so I don’t know if it changed.
I don’t think the clock resets if the debt is sold. Just if you make certain actions on it, though I can’t remember the particulars right now and the state you reside in will matter
Edit: ah ok Ukraine, I’m not sure, but good luck, you’ve got this. Screw those vultures
Yeah I think the reset might depend on the state or there is a court action they can take. I just know it’s better in Michigan than it was in Virginia.
Thank you so much for your support — it really means a lot right now.
I’m from Ukraine, and sadly there are organizations here that act like the law doesn’t apply to them.
They cross all boundaries — making threats, spreading my personal info, harassing not only me and my family but even complete strangers.
They pressure people I don’t even know to force payment. It’s exhausting and terrifying every day.That’s rough, mate. I have no idea how it works in other countries. Sorry I wrote that all up and none of it pertains to you but hopefully it can help others. All I can really offer is this: these scum are predatory companies. They set you up to fail and then capitalize on it when you do. This isn’t your fault and doesn’t reflect on your quality or value as a human being. And hopefully anyone they call tells them to fuck off. Maybe tell folks it’s a paperwork issue/mistaken identity and they would rather harass you into paying than fix their records and figure out who actually owes the money.
That might not help with the actual debt but at least everyone gets the impression it’s not your fault but a dystopian bureaucracy. That’s very believable.
Thank you so much for your words, it really helps to feel heard. I’m from Ukraine, and sadly, you’re absolutely right — some of these companies are predatory to the point of madness. They don’t care about laws or identity, they’ll call anyone and everyone, share my private info, threaten people I’ve never met.
It’s not just harassment — it’s psychological war. Appreciate your support, truly.
If you’ve ever felt like this — thank you for reading. Even being seen means a lot.
My Spidy senses tell me no.
This was me in 2014. I didn’t think of it as drowining, it felt more like a plow working against too much snow: Things kept piling up in front, and not enough was shoved away, to the point where things started coming over the plow and starting to bury me.
Took me five years, some help, and a lot of luck to get things under control and start turning things around. And in 2024 all expensive debts were paid off.
It takes effort, but it can get better.
That snow and plow image hit really hard.
Thank you for sharing your story — it means a lot right now. I truly hope I can say the same in 2026.
Hi,
Just wanna show support ❤️
Life is often not about how hard you work or how good you are, it’s often just about how lucky you have been. Were you born fortunate, were you lucky enough to get the job you needed, lucky to have been taught and understand financial literacy, lucky enough to avoid major health complications, lucky enough to be “smart” etc.
Frankly it’s incredible that we live as long as we do with the utter lack of compassion and community in the world.
I’m not going to financially contribute to your cause, which makes me complicit in your suffering, I’m sorry for that. I hope that your suffering is reduced and that your “luck” improves.
I honestly appreciate your words. You said what most won’t even acknowledge.
No worries about support — sometimes saying it out loud is already a lot. Thank you.
You got this. Things will get better.
Thank you. Even two words like that mean a lot right now.
Do they work world wide?
