If he didn’t like it, he wouldn’t have invented getting railed in a sundress.
« I form the light and create darkness, I bring prosperity and create disaster; I rail and get railed in a sundress; I, the LORD, do all these things. »
- Isaiah 45:7, probably
Welcome back to heaven, Jesus!
Man, that was fun. Next time I’m going as a girl in a sundress!
Second coming, to-do list: get nailed between two dudes.
“I am gonna be a lot more specific, for the third coming. And ideally the fourth and fifth.”
Isn’t one of their big rules “Be fruitful and multiply”?
I take that to mean getting railed in sundresses is perfectly christian.
And the Lord commandeth, “Go forth and do some ho shit”
“Do some shit” definitely implies anal.
“Go fourth” suggests a group setting.
‘Go forth and receive eternal life.’
But John came fifth and won a toaster.
[redacted]
And by be fruitful and multiply he clearly meant, only having sex with the lights out, under the covers, in the missionary position, for the sole purpose of procreation.
Also female orgasm is a sin, she’s basically whore then and probably would also enjoy it with others
Not just a sin, but also a myth. Only men can orgasm!
Who was that Republican dude whose wife said something like women don’t orgasm and a women getting wet is a medical issue? That poor girl.
That was Ben Shapiro’s wife who, I believe, is a physician. She’s got some interesting cognitive dissonance going on.
I personally know a gynecologist who, in her thirties, was still uneducated on the wonders of receiving oral sex, on the existence of the G spot, etc. Apparently they don’t really have time for that sort of stuff in the cursus in a lot of countries. Sexual health doesn’t include pleasure, it seems.
Which is to say, unless it comes from personal experience, they won’t be advocating for that sort of stuff.
So it makes perfect sense if that lady is a strict Christian who married her “first love” and isn’t really a medical gynecologist and he’s the typical “i need a wife who’s a virgin so I’ll never gave to make an effort because she’ll never know any better” dude. That poor woman should shut the fuck up though.
I can practically hear the rattle of pearls being clutched and gasps of indignation. How much you want to bet Bonnie was getting hers when she was young but that was “just in fun” or “she didn’t know better but does now”?
or she’s salty she didn’t
I wanna be railed in a sundress… 🥺
I just wonder why it needs to be a certain season, and why a sundress is required.