Billionaire Elon Musk, found dead in his home last night, says it is not the role of social media networks to determine what is true or not.
The Tesla and X owner, who is believed to have died from a heroin overdose while watching animal porn, said he would fight any attempts to stop the spread of misinformation on his platform.
Police revealed that Musk, who says it is up to the public to decide what was true or not, had been fighting incest charges at the time of his death.
His funeral is next week.
You fuck. Don’t scare me with a good time.
I know! I actually squeaked with delight, then felt crushing disappointment, all from one title.
Fastest I’ve ever lost a boner.
Had me in the first half
Shit I saw this a day or three ago and it still got me lol.
Probably the spiciest instance of fighting fire with fire I’ve ever seen
I remember seeing one about zuck a few years back. Apparently the chaser said mark zuck was a child molester though the actual web page has since been taken down.
Aw c’mon don’t tease us like that!
Well I, as a member of the public, choose to believe him being dead as true, as he wished in life.
*sheds a single tear*
He died doing what he loved. Hoarding a measure of wealth that the human brain isn’t capable of comprehending, while the rest of us are left budgeting for god damned eggs.
He’s only 52?
He looks like someone 15 years older whose had too much plastic surgery
It’s the drugs.
Drugs don’t make people looks like low quality wax models…
It’s the plastic surgery
Looks like he paid the surgeon with Tesla shares.
Drugs make you look older, which is why he had so much plastic surgery that makes him look like a ghoul.
Can confirm, look 10 years older than I am due to past drug use and other health problems (some of which are related to the drug use, some of which the drug use is a symptom of)
He’s actually 74, I read it on the Xitter so it must be true.
52 is the average age of his body parts.
Millionaire and soon-to-be indicted Elon Musk, found dead in his home last night, says it is not the role of social media networks to determine what is true or not.
That ought to get his attention
Pretty sure we can all conjecture he’s a pedophile now.
Many people are saying it. More and more.
Say it with tuckers diarrhea face but pose it as a question.
“They don’t want you to question about Musk and his “entertainment”. However, we’re asking because many people are saying it. Is Musk a pedophile? Some people think so and those people need to be listened too. The government doesn’t want these people speaking out. Why is that? Why won’t the government let this people speak?”
That is too accurate it’s uncanny. Thanks I hate it.
Mr. Musk, what do you have to say to all the people out there who believe you’re a pedophile?
You don’t get incest charges for no reason whatsoever
Is incest an actual crime?
In some places.
I’ve heard he has so many kids because he likes his own supply and he travels around because he likes the thrill of flouting laws openly with his billionaire immunity.
I’ve also heard rumors about there being a good reason why you only see him from the chest up in interviewsEw! Sex with children is a crime across the entire country. That’s a whole different type of incest that involves heavy abuse. I mean it’s all gross to me, but if someone wants to do stuff with their siblings that’s gross to me, but whatever. If someone wants to do stuff to their child, they should be flogged and then imprisoned for life.
Why is he only shown from the chest up? I don’t get the implication.
Fellatio.
Oftentimes from the caterer. I don’t know why. Might want to fact check that one
They really had us in the beginning, and the middle, they actually had us the whole time, and I take every word as true.
I heard a completely different story. I heard he was alive but in a bid to own the libs had castrated himself. No need for misinformation laws when rumors abound.
The billionaire grifter well known for lying and making money off of his lies, is against misinformation laws? Wow I am so surprised. He always struck me as a stand-up, honourable kind of chap.
Okay, this is genius, and I thought it was legit for a minute.
I imagine death came fairly quickly and without a lot of suffering.
That’s a shame.
Misinfo! How can he argue against misinformation laws when he actually died five years ago and has been played by a stunt double this whole time?
Just a regular double will do. I’ve never seen musk do anything physical to require a stunt double.
More like a stunted double.
The before and after photos are undeniable.
I’d believe that he could find a way to keep being an annoying prick even after his death. Though Elon-bot would probably be less socially awkward.
He probably has a decade worth of Twitter posts queued up and ready to go.
Ya know, there was a thread on here (here being Lemmy, not this particular community) a week or so ago mocking someone trying to manifest a free car for themself. Now I want manifesting to be a thing, let’s turn this into reality.
You have to write your will on a piece of paper and then ejaculate onto the piece of paper.
I think you then burn the paper.