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I’m glad that Asexuality is getting more attention. So many people have said, “Well, you must be attracted to somebody.” To me it’s like admiring a pretty vase, or a work of art. I can see that it’s beautiful, but I still don’t want to have relations with it.
Why have sex when you can have cake?
Because the cake is a lie, duh
Your comment was a triumph!
I’m making a note here, the comment was a huge success!
Most of the time, the sex is too.
But you can’t have cake and eat it too.
I mean, you absolutely can, you just have to make two cakes
it refers to the one cake. “You can’t have a cake and eat another one” would be yours.
But I like your attitude! Can you make me two cakes? I’m totally not going to eat both of them (I am but don’t tell anyone)
Two cakes? Not with this egg shortage.
I was taking it to refer to just some amount of possessed cake regardless of its subdivisions, It doesnt strike me as odd to refer to food that way (same as how, if I made you a bunch of french fries, it wouldn’t be terribly unusual for me to ask “do you like it?” while referring to the meal, despite it being made up of many individual units).
True, without article (the or a), your reading totally makes sense
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I have never understood this saying.
I never really understood why people misunderstand or denounce the experience of ace people…
Ignoring some nuance, it feels like it’s simply “feels no or reduced sexual attraction”. That sounds pretty clear to me; that feeling you get when you look at a pretty lady? They don’t experience that.
Yet there’s always statements like “but they have sex!”, “But they like being tied up!” and “They’re in a relationship!”. People gotta overcomplicate things or look for reasons to discredit them, I guess?
I guess it always felt the same to me as when they said I’d eventually want a baby.
When I was younger and living in a conservative area, it seemed like I was broken. where people often started conversations by asking about my husband/boyfriend/crush before hitting oh, you must be one of those weird women who doesn’t want husband/house/kids. a lesbian. (you’ll obviously eventually want sex and progeny. to do otherwise is just… immature, especially in a woman.)
When I was older and had moved to an area with a lot more different kinds of folks and it came up less, it’s just who I am. if some wiseass thinks they know better about how I feel - well, they’re definitely not relationship material. not even friends.
and it’s a spectrum. I currently have a partner I see every 6-8 weeks, which works for us. but for decades it would be easier to say I was ace than try to explain the circumstances where that might change.
Surely you see how saying “I don’t like sex” and “I have sex” seem contradictory, right? If you express those two ideas how is it not logical to conclude that you’re either just an idiot or are talking about rape? How does those two statements lead to the conclusion of “you most be asexual”?
If your a person who has sex, what makes you asexual and not a person with low libido?
As I understand it, some ace people find sex gross and obviously want to avoid anything relating to it it, but some are neutral towards it. If they are with a partner that likes sex, then they may enjoy having sex because it makes their partner happy. Or maybe they find the physical sensations enjoyable, but not looking at porn/people. Or maybe they just want to do it for good prostate health.
They are not contradictory because “I don’t like sex” (which I didn’t actually say) doesn’t necessarily imply “I dislike the idea of sex”.
Ironically enough, lots of people throughout my life have claimed that I’m asexual (but i am not), in fact, almost assured me that i’m asexual. It’s really funny if it wouldn’t be so hurt-causing how wrong people can be sometimes.
(I had a crush on a girl and later found out other’s have told her i’m asexual behind my back even though i am not.)
Make War not Love
I don’t understand why you need to do public something that is supposed so be part of your private life. What do you expect to get from society when you show your sexual or non sexual preference? You will be always be rejected by a portion of it. Just because you are different. For me is irrelevant what other choose, they are people just like me and that’s enough. I don’t have to discuss about those things with anyone. It’s the choose and freedom as humans.
For me is irrelevant what other choose, they are people just like me and that’s enough.
As far as I understand, the whole point is that some people don’t think it’s irrelevant and discriminate others based on their sexuality (or lack thereof). So they make it public and open up about it to show that it is not bad and lots of people are like that - that’s kinda the whole point of the pride parades I think?
There will be always people that don’t like you because you are different . Because is a personal and private subject. They feel they can judge . So is like feeding them. We have to protect of private and personal word. I don’t agree is the way.
They don’t want to have to hide who they are, make up lies, etc. They are demanding the right to be who they are. I think it’s great.
Those people are called bigots and we should continue to expose and ridicule them for their idiotic biases.
They are not just bigots, they are people that were rised with a poor point of view and they attach to the point of view of others without having a criticism mentality. They just repeat . Like religion. The problem if you expose your private life as a cost, society is fucked up and doesn’t matter people will always criticize you. No matter if is of sexual orientation or if you don’t like football. Or alcohol.
100%.
I’m all for acceptance but broadcasting your sexuality is strange and unnecessary. I understand there’s some need for it for acceptance etc, but the amount of shit on Lemmy about your sexual orientation is overboard. I don’t care or want to know who you fuck.
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People use the phonetic shortening “ace” to refer to asexuals. And then some asexuals leaned into that and use playing card suits to indicate how their stance on romance is. So, an ace of hearts indicates someone who’s not into sex, but does enjoy romance. Whereas the ace of spades (being kind of an upside-down heart) says that they enjoy neither sex nor romance.
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The implication that only asexuals ever have anything on their minds other than sex is more than a bit ridiculous.
Yes, yes, of course. Why didn’t the author think about you in all of this?
“I like pancakes” “So you hate waffles?”
#teamwaffles
I like both, actually
I am a pan-cakeual
I don’t think this is implied. The idea is probably that, like so many things, it’s on a spectrum and ‘asexual’ would describe one end of the spectrum. There is another end of the spectrum, but no one is saying everyone is on the outer end of it. But I must admit, I do somewhat share your sentiment, I’ve read lots of things by self-proclaimed asexuals in which I recognize myself, but I also think I have a quite average sexdrive. It makes me wonder if some people aren’t just a bit too eager to define themselves as different from the norm. I’m not talking about the further end of the spectrum, but there are those that really aren’t that different from your average person, but seem to want a box to fit in. Reading their description I would place them somewhere in the middle and still they describe themselves as asexual. Not that I care, go ahead, define yourself whatever way you want, if you want to think that you’re very different go ahead, it really doesn’t bother me, and who knows maybe you’re right, who am I to tell you you’re wrong?
